It's kind of a dreary day outside.
It's that cold, overcast, about to snow kind of feeling out there. My god, you mean to tell me we're actually finally going to get some winter weather now that it's almost December?
Not that it bothers me, mind you. I really like fall weather. But last winter started so early and ended so late that it seems weird for it not to be here yet.
So I'm going to audition at Mermaid tonight. I feel a little silly dancing at the age of thirty but I'd feel even sillier flipping burgers and asking "is this for here or to go?" at the age of thirty. I'm a little nervous and self conscious about it. Rob thinks I'm in pretty good shape now, and I guess I am. Maybe I didn't put on as much weight as I originally thought. Maybe it was only five or ten pounds. When you're as short as I am I guess every pound counts.
I could really use the money anyhow. We both could.
So I'll give it a shot. The worst that will happen is I won't be able to get hired. But I think I will be able to. And I think I could feasibly make some good money doing it. At least, when we went in there, the dancers seemed to be making some good money. I think I'm partly nervous and I think it partly just seems a bit surreal.
I have that interview at the church but if I get the job I'll just cancel. I'm not terribly keen on office work anyhow, and my experiences looking for it have been pretty bad in this town. The interview isn't til three so even if I work til two, I'm bound to be up by noon, and can give them plenty of heads up.
So...I must be on crack.
I signed up for a bunch of classes at Valley next semester. Don't ask me why, since I hate the school.
I signed up for intro to philosophy, journalism, science fiction literature and ethics. Well, the ethics class is a telecourse so that might not be bad. On the other hand, it being an ethics course, it might be kind of weird if it were in a non classroom environment, so that could be a good or a bad thing.
I think it's just that my brain is so stagnant and I really want something to wake it up. The time here seems to drag just so much and it would be good to be able to invest myself in something that at least has the potential to be challenging.
On the other hand, I'm not so sure if I'll actually get that at Valley. You know, we're talking about the college that not only feels like a high school but actually brings high school kids in a big yellow school bus and has a PE requirement to get your associate's degree! It's kind of a ludicrous place.
But I look at it like this: I don't have to actually take the classes if I don't want to. At least this way, I've reserved my spot in them.
I don't even know if I'll be able to scrape the money together. It's all very iffy. Whether I should take the courses is iffy. Whether I'll be able to is iffy, and whether we would even be in town long enough to complete them is iffy. It's all a big giant crap shoot, and I'm just kind of playing the whole thing by ear.