As we drove around in the rain today, I looked at the landscape of Kalamazoo. I looked at the clouds, and imagined them shattering open, a sort of post apocalyptic landscape. It was sort of comforting and symbolic, of all the illusions I had about living here, about all the mistakes that I made. I thought of painting it. I still might.
Last night, I went and saw New York Room play. It was a great show. They're a really good band, I would like to see them get more recognition. I got very drunk. I was drinking tequila, which I hadn't done in something like a year. It got me to thinking, just about stuff, life, people, all of that. I am very homesick, and it's amazing the clarity that just being here for under two months has given me. The things that I bore grudges about seem silly, the obstacles minor. Well, you know what they say about hindsight.
I was very much in an "I love you man" sort of mood and had all sorts of insights I wished to share with the world, and this was interspersed with occasional frustrations at living here, wavering between acceptance and restlessness. Eventually, we went home and I made rambling and nonsensical posts, some of which would get misinterpreted. Oh well.
Today, I slept off the hangover, finally feeling well enough for coffee around five pm. We rented some movies and went to fourth coast for some additional caffeine. Tomorrow we go to a party in Chicago. I am very excited about this.